Happy November

It's so blissfully cool up here now. My thermometer hasn't moved past 55° F all day. It was sunny and cool and autumny. I love that. Got a lot of stuff done today, too, which means that my Sunday is all mine. I think I'm gonna go to the gym and work out. I need the whirlpool for my aching legs and back. I need the steamroom for my skin...and I mean the skin on my face, darlings. I haven't ever had a facial, but I know that when I go to the steamroom, it always clears up the pores and makes my skin feel better.

Gosh, that's about it, I'd say. Nothing exciting happening here. I missed Halloween in the Castro (let's call it Halloween Lite due to the lack of alcohol and the closing of the street at the stroke of midnight. Honestly, what is this world coming to?) I don't know if the news reports are accurate, but one of them said as many as 200,000 people were there last night. That's a little much, doncha think?

Anyhoo, Happy November Day.

So, a couple of days ago, I got an e-mail from a Wiccan who said that this time of the year, 31st October through 2nd November is the best time of year to contact members of our dearly departed. I don't know why I got this e-mail, but I did, and it suggested that if I have any questions or unfinished business with which I could use some otherworldly help, now would be the best time to do so...and she has a kit to sell me for $49.95 plus tax and shipping that will help me do just that. Um, I know it's like All Souls' Day or Dia de las muertas or something like that, so maybe she's partially right, the part about the otherworldly help, that is, and not the kit for sale. I just hate making every occasion commercial. Like, tomorrow when I go to Safeway, I'm just expecting to see Xmas decor all around. I hope I can snag a sale on the Halloween candies that I missed out on this year before it's time to buy red and green M&Ms.

That's all.

Sunday Sunday

1. Taboo :: We don't talk about it.
2. Poison :: Bad hair
3. 1983 :: I'm trying to block it out.
4. Tim :: McGraw
5. Groovy :: Deeelite
6. Italy :: Ciao, bella.
7. Think :: Different
8. Penthouse :: Park Avenue
9. Shelter :: I'll Be Your Shelter
10. Twinkie :: Creamy and delish

My goal for November

is to have at least one post per day so my calendar will be completely full. That calendar up there is full of links to each day of the month, and I want to see it full of links. So, look out. I am not even promising that they'll all make sense. They'll just be there. K? K.

Ya know

I think it's great that there are people out there who want to express their individuality and who do so freely. I think it's great that I can live in such a beautiful and diverse part of the country where being a free spirit is a good thing and it is encouraged. I think it's a positive reminder of the fact that we are all unique individuals with dreams, goals, and ideas all our own. But you know what? Being free and individual and unique doesn't mean that you have to stop bathing. OK?

And before I forget, I wish all of you San Franciscans very much luck in choosing a new mayor tomorrow.

A Word to the Wise

Don't ever work as an independent contractor. Ever. My former employer still hasn't paid me for the month of August, and I'm so fed up trying to contact him to find out where my damn check is. So I start calling around, to, like, the department of labor to ask them for help, and the response I get is that the department of labor can't help me at all. If I really want it that badly, I have to take my former employer to court to fight over a paycheck. I can't afford a lawyer to drag that bastard to court just for a few grand only to have the lawyer take half of it back as fees. So that's just fucking great, isn't it?

Just thought I'd share. Another lesson learned.

Coughing, Aching, Stuffy Head

I'm sick as a dog. I was sneezing and blowing my nose all day yesterday. I thought it was just hay fever, and I should have seen the signs coming on. Last night, I was in bed by eight o'clock. I had a fever, I broke it last night as I usually do, and now I'm still kinda queasy. It feels like all of my senses are muted. Everything I hear sounds like it's filtered through cotton. I have lost my sense of balance. I can't smell anything.

Last night, before I was really sick, I was making dinner. I made baked pork chops and baked apples. I know they smelled good just because of the ingredients in each dish, but I couldn't smell them, and that just pisses me off. I love to smell food cooking. There was enough cinnamon in the apples and just enough of it filtered through my congested nose to show me what I was missing. Of course, I was not even hungry enough to eat, but Roommate enjoyed it.

So today is just a rest and relax day.

Wow

I feel so much better knowing where the money from all of my Big Macs went.

So There

Contrary to what anyone says, there was a post made on Friday.

And by some stroke of good luck, I got the first quarter of my final payment from my former boss. I only got a quarter of it because of some silly concession I made to him a couple of months ago. He couldn't afford to pay me the whole thing, so I suggested he break it up over four payments in order to ease his burden. I'm trying to be a patient, understanding, and kind person, and where does it get me? On the train for Reno. I just don't understand why I should have to remind this "businessman" of his financial responsibilities. You know? It's like, dude, you owe me. Do you think there's a statute of limitations on that debt? OK, there might be, but it is sure as hell longer than two fucking months. K?

Anyway, I can breathe a little easier now. I'm still out of a job, which sucks, even though there are so many new jobs out there from which I can choose. I have a couple of interviews this coming week, so I'm crossing my fingers and saying my prayers. I might even go to church. Yeah, and monkeys might fly out of my butt.

Saturday, Rainy Saturday

A do-nothing day, so I made a new banner. How does it look?

You'll Never Get to Heaven If You're Scared of Getting High

I had the supreme honor of listening to Kylie Minogue's new album, "Body Language." I think it's fabulous. It won't be released in the US until February, but it will be released in the UK (and probably the rest of the world) later this month. I love that woman. She has got a great set of writers and musicians around her.

Greenish Glue

I'm at the tail end of my cold, here, and it's getting pretty nasty. My nose isn't runny anymore, but my head is still congested. This stuff has morphed into a greenish goopy glue substance that wants to drip down the back of my throat or clog up my nasal passages. I'm just getting to breathe through my nose again, and every few minutes when I try to inhale through my nose, I get blocked by this goop. So I blow, and I blow, and at the risk of sounding gross, out comes this green glop that's slimy and just about runny, not as wet as before, but runny enough to be a potential mess if I'm not careful. I hate this part. My mother always said that once this crap starts to go this color, the cold is over and this is just the cleanup part...or something like that. It's just ick. I know, thanks for sharing.

Temp

I had an interview at another temp agency, today. This one sounded more promising than any of the others, and that's what worries me. I don't want to get my hopes up, but the person I spoke with suggested that she had contacts in an industry for which I would really be perfect. I'll e-mail her later this week to find out if she came up with anything. I have to keep looking and not put any eggs in this basket. I left with a good feeling, though. While I was in the lobby waiting to be interviewed, there were a few girls who had applied for jobs there, and the receptionist told them that, in a few uncertain terms, they were not qualified for the positions for which the company staffs. So I guess the fact that I got past the front desk says a little something. I don't know, was it the tie?

Panther

Well, I am happy to say that I successfully upgraded both of my machines to Panther (OS X 10.3) today. Contrary to what every other Chicken Little said about the upgrade process, there were no bombs, no kernel panics, no issues what ever. I didn't have to log in as root, I didn't have to type in a string of incomprehensible words in Terminal, I didn't have to re-format my hard drive and install from scratch. Insert disc 1, insert disc 2, insert disc 3, et voilà. I'm so happy. It's really cool. But that's what the Mac is all about.

It's Fun to Stay at the YMCA

I went to the Y for the first time in a long time today. I wanted to get out of this apartment, get some fresh air, and maybe some fresh tail. Ha ha. It was nice to be there, at the Central Y on Golden Gate, at two in the afternoon when there were very few people there. Even the pool was almost empty, just two other people swimming. Their pool is nice, too. It has a real deep end which is over eight feet deep. If there's one thing I love to do, it's tread water in the deep end. I can tread water for days.

Anyway, if it's like that every day, and if I'm going to be umemployed for a while here, I might as well make good use of the membership I've been paying. And hey, if I come out of this looking fabulous, then hey, bully for me.

Adjectives

1. Using one adjective, describe your current living space.
   Inadequate.

2. Using two adjectives, describe your current employer.
   Non-existent, simple.

3. Using three adjectives, describe your favorite hobby/pastime.
   Educational, creative, expressive.

4. Using four adjectives, describe your typical day.
   Monotonous, repetitive, half-baked, unstimulating. (I'm working on this one.)

5. Using five adjectives, describe your ideal life.
   Adventurous, wayfaring, edifying, peaceful, content.

At the Movies

I had a Michael Double Feature today. Every once in a while, I find movies that I want to see and make a day of seeing them all, or at least two of them back to back. The Loews Metreon Theatres & IMAX shows most of the big current releases, so I head there a lot. Today, I saw Kill Bill, Volume 1, and The Matrix: Revolutions in IMAX.

The Matrix was cool, and it is the end of this trilogy, although the Oracle said something that could possibly be a hint at future adventures of Neo and the Gang. Or not. I don't know. I love these three movies for their sci-fi qualities. I love the action, the cinematography, the whole look and feel, but the underlying story is sometimes beyond my grasp. Maybe I'm reading into it too much, and maybe it's more simple than I think it is, but some of it just escapes me. I just have a feeling I'm missing something bigger. Wouldn't be the first time. I thought Jada looked great.

Kill Bill, on the other hand, was completely and totally fucking awesome. I know it's bloody and gory, but fuck it. It works, and it rocks. I think I was the only one in the theatre laughing at some of the jokes, too. I mean, when Black Mamba (whose real name was always bleeped out like a bad word in a daytime drama) asks O-Ren Ishii if she had any other subordinates to fight, and when Go Go (O-Ren's personal bodyguard) shows up in her schoolgirl outfit spinning a mace and says "Hi!" I mean, the timing is priceless! No one else found it so, however. "Leave your limbs where they are. They're mine now." I mean, that is just fucking hilarious!

It's styled like a 60s or 70s era kung-fu/samurai movie with the spraying blood, the almost cheesy special effects, and some of the kooky dialog. It's so good, it's one I want to see again. I loved Uma, Lucy Liu was awesome, as were Vivica and Darryl. I can't wait for Volume 2 next year.

And then I went to the Y, swam a lot, stopped by the Pilsner for a drink with Roommate, and then went home.

Bowling in Berkeley

So, I go to the Berkeley Bowl today because I'd never been there before, and I needed to price some dry goods that I knew they sold in bulk. I'm driving down Shattuck which is too narrow for the traffic as it is, and as I'm approaching the Bowl, the traffic becomes even more congested. I couldn't find a spot in the parking lot, so I drive around the corner to park on the street instead.

As I round the corner back on Shattuck, I see a large spot on the opposite side of the road in which I knew I could park easily...but I was going the wrong way to park in it. So I look in the mirrors, there's no one coming in either direction at that second, there are no cops around, and bam, illegal U-turn right into the spot. Hello. I was very proud of that. Takes courage to break the law, you know.

As I get out of the car, an older lady approached me on the sidewalk and said, "I should report a citizen's arrest for your illegal U-turn, young man." (I hate it when people call me young man, like I'm still 15 or something.) I reply, very curtly and self-righteously, "Yeah, I know it was illegal, so go ahead and report me if you want, and then try to find parking in this neighborhood." How rude! I turned and walked into the store.

And then I was a little disappointed in the Bowl itself. A little over-hyped. I was completely stunned at the display of produce, though. More fruits and vegetables than I have seen in a grocery store in a long time. So much in quantity and variety. That was impressive. And it all looked good and fresh, big, healthy pieces of fruits and vegetables.

The rest of the store was ho hum. Prices even more expensive than at Safeway. They had a shelf, a rather large shelf of platters of olives of all types and in different marinades for $7.49 a pound. I'm not sure, because I don't usually buy olives by the pound, but is that outrageous? It sounds absurd to me.

That's all. I think the latest placement agency teased me big time today. I had a call, forwarded a resume, and then was turned down. Apparently some of my experience is so "old" that it doesn't count as experience anymore. I've never heard that one before. I have a smile on my face, albeit forced and strained. In fact, it feels like a vein is going to pop. OK, OK, it wasn't meant to be.

I'm really beginning to believe in fate or at least that there are no coincidences. If I had been given this job, I might have hated it. If I had fought for this job, I might have come to regret it. I woke up this morning with a new direction in which to head. It's something I had wanted to do a long time ago and was then sidetracked into living life. So maybe it's time to rekindle that particular spark and go for it. What do I have to lose?

I Need to Get Out More

I had a dream last night that I was Fallon Carrington...go ahead and get it out of your system. I was asking Krystle for some money because we were all broke. When Krystle got out her checkbook, I realized that it was a bad idea to be asking for money from my father's wife. It also occurred to me that he would be intensely angry if I took the money, so I pleaded with Krystle to put the checkbook away and to forget it. I suddenly became very ashamed at this request. She insisted, I pleaded, and she wrote me a check for $121.57. That's all she said she could afford. I took the check reluctantly, half afraid of my father's wrath, half pissed off because all she gave me was a measely hundred bucks...and change. I mean, really.

Five of This, Five of That

1. List five things you'd like to accomplish by the end of the year.
   A new job; visit people whom I promised I'd visit; there isn't that much that I have to do, really.

2. List five people you've lost contact with that you'd like to hear from again.
   My friends Anastasia, Terri, Sarah, Kate, and Duna...in no particular order.

3. List five things you'd like to learn how to do.
   Play the guitar, speak many languages, fly a plane, scuba dive, cook.

4. List five things you'd do if you won the lottery (no limit).
   Travel the world, spending as much time in as many countries as I can stand; drive through every state and province in North America, spending as much time in each place as I'd like; sail the world's oceans; build a house completely customized to my every whim (solar, people, go solar); help others.

5. List five things you do that help you relax.
   Breathe deeply; visualize; visit the hot tub; believe it or not, screaming and breaking things helps me relax a lot, too. It's the release of all of that energy and stress that just feels so good. I love to hear the sound of breaking glass. I knew a guy who (supposedly) had a room in the back of his house where he would stockpile glass jars and bottles just so that he could have an old-fashioned hissy fit and break them when he needed to. He said that he did this so he wouldn't hurt anyone else.

   You know, there was one time when I first moved up here that was so completely stressful and unplanned that I snapped, I mean, I just lost it. The morning I lost it, I disappeared, so to speak. I didn't show up for or call in to work (something I had never done before), I turned off my pager so no one could reach me (this was before I could afford a mobile phone), and I hung out at the Y all day long. I mean, all day. I sat in the activity pool and floated for what seemed like hours. People stared and talked, but I floated and relaxed and realized that all the shit that had been piling up on my shoulders was irrelevant. If I had a pool at my disposal, at my fingertips, I would float, a lot.

It's the Most @#%*& Time of the Year

There's a radio station in the Bay Area that has changed its format to accommodate the quickly approaching Xmas season. They are now playing Xmas/holiday music 24/7. I can't tell you how completely annoying it is to wake up to Roommate listening to Mariah Carey singing "O Holy Night." And then to hear Madonna's "Santa Baby" and "Silver Bells" à la Kenny G? I mean, first of all, it's not even Turkey Day yet, and then to add all of this malarky to the airwaves all day, all night, all week long?

I've begged and pleaded with Roommate to turn the shit off, but he insists that he never gets enough of it. So he wins, I put my headphones on and pray that I won't go deaf trying to drown out that incessant blithering noise. I am not a holiday person, bah humbug and all that jazz.

I think what amazes me is that there is so much of this music around. It must obligatory for every musician to make their own album of holiday standards in their own voice. There's one future rock star musician out there who I'm hoping will eschew this tradition, however, if you can't, I'll understand.

Go Ahead, Call Me a Geek

I need to start working again really soon. OMG. I can't wait. Buffy's fifth season comes out in a couple of weeks.

Am I being taught a lesson here?

Music

Isn't it amazing what a hold on our memories music has? Am I wrong here? Do you know what I mean? You understand, right?

Take, for instance, Depeche Mode Violator. That album will forever have only one memory for me, and it is that of being in the navy at DLI surrounded by my new best friends, smoking cigarettes, studying Arabic (and Hebrew), and gossiping about who in the barracks was gay. That's it. Nothing more. Nothing less. Even when I play it now, like right this second if I listen to "Blue Dress," I'll think of that ultra-cute airman first class in my Arabic class. His name was John, and that's all I'll tell here. He was so goddamn dreamy, I coulda, man I coulda. I just know it. He had the most beautiful full and luscious lips. And could he fill out his BDUs. Damn. Wow. We used to debate which of the two songs "Blue Dress" or "Clean" was the better. I think I engaged him in that pedantic dialogue just to keep him talking to me. Hey, I was 18, what the hell did I know?

So then I hear I Do Not Want What I Haven't Got (you know, by Sinéad O'Connor), and I think of when I first moved to California, in general. Well, there was this guy in boot camp, in San Diego, who drooled over this woman. On Sundays we were allowed to listen to the radio for a couple of hours while we studied and shined our boots. At this time, "Nothing Compares 2 U" was pretty popular, and this guy, this total queen of a guy used to curl up and rock to the music. I'd have to say it was something I'd rather not remember, but you know, I can't help it. He was cute, though, so I'll cut him some slack. He had a nice ass, too. And then when I moved up to Monterey, I met a group of people who loved her and her music, and new memories were formed, and now it's all a mix of images, smells, feelings. "I am stretched on your grave, and will lie there forever."

Happy Thanksgiving

I know it's late in the day, but happy Turkey Day anyway. Don't eat too much.